Checkered Flag

Car Macros, Carl for the Lulz

2007-10-29T16:21:22Z

I have an unhealthy obsession with Cat Macros. So I thought I'd make Car Macros, and have a little lulz at the expense of my darling Carl, who *almost* had the worst week ever last week... except for finishing #2 on Sunday. I guess Sunday is THIS week, so he did have the worst week ever last week.

On to the funneh:

Carl is like the Incredible Hulk. But he turns red.

Biff: "What would you do if he swung at you?"
Dude: "Man, I don't know"

JP: "Look, Jamie, mi hombre, we is hombres. We is same-sized hombres. If we stick together, maybe Carl gonna stay away. Alright, now gimme hand gesture where we touch fists like we is brothers."

Kasey: "I'd like to see Carl try and punch me when I'm standin' all the way up here."

Clint: "Dude, man, don't punch me in the kidneys"
Carl: "I. AM. NOT. GOING. TO. PUNCH. YOU."
Clint: "Whatever."

Matt: "Hey, Carl, look at all the cameras. You should try and punch me again!"
Carl: "Shut up, Matt."

Carl: "Congratulations on winn..."
Jimmie: "Are you gonna punch me?"

Jack: "Son, I wouldn't recommend punching the man that signs your checks..."
Carl: "JEEZ!! I swear I'm not going to punch you. Just stop calling my Mom, okay?"

Allright, I'm done making fun of you, Carl. Though I only did it because I love you. And congrats on finishing second place in Atlanta this weekend.

carlmaclovin @ 2007-10-22T17:58:00

2007-10-22T22:11:19Z

Congrats, Kimi. #1!

Horrah! and Woops!

2007-10-18T13:38:25Z

Horrah - midterms are over!

Also...

Woops. Yesterday was Kimi's Birthday.

HAPPY [BELATED] BIRTHDAY, KIMI!!!!!
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO!

carlmaclovin @ 2007-10-16T10:54:00

2007-10-16T14:57:34Z

*blarf*
Well, I wouldn't go that far, but I'm pretty sick of Hendrick winning races, too.

Le Sigh

2007-10-15T15:32:15Z

It is with a heavy sigh of resignation that I post congratulations to Mr. Jeff Gordon for winning the Bank of America 500.

We have this photo to thank for me hating Jeff a little bit less:

... because baby Ella Sofia is kinda cute. And it kinda melts my heart. A little bit. Just a teeny weeny bit. BUT NOT VERY MUCH. I'm still totally about Boo-ing him during driver introductions.

SOURCE.

Happy Birthday, Junior!

2007-10-10T15:34:30Z

Party like it's your birthday.

Woot.

In lieu of acknowledging the winner of the UAW-Ford 500...

2007-10-08T19:36:09Z

The 2008 Miss Food City pageant is coming up!!

No, it's not a joke! In addition to a kick-ass photo-op with
the World's Most Giant (Motorized?) Shopping Cart, Miss Food City
receives $500 cash and additional prizes!

The 2008 Miss Food City will serve as the K-VA-T Food Stores
representative throughout the year at races and race-related
events (including the Nextel Cup Food City 500!!)

The reigning Miss Food City, Britney Hagy, will present the
crown to this year's winner!

Count me in! Here's my application:

*waves* Hi, y'all, I'm Carlmaclovin!

I'd like to be Miss Food City because, unlike some of the other pageant contestants, I actually eat food. Some of my fave foods are sammitches, freedom fries, frozen pizza that you can cook by yourself in the oven, those Fun-Size Snickers candy bars, Nerds Rope, and Ben & Jerry's ice cream... Sometimes I play with food, too. FOOD FIGHT! I feel like these things qualify me as a serious contender to be Miss Food City.

I think the #1 way to achieve World Peace is with food. Let's face it - happy people are full people. And happy people don't start wars. So, by having a grocery store on every block in the entire world, I think we can make World Peace happen.

I'm also under the impression that former Miss Food City winners have dated NASCAR drivers, including Kasey Kahne. This is pretty much the reason I'm entering this contest. I like Kasey Kahne just as much as I like food, but if I had to choose between the two, I'd pick Kasey. Because I could just nibble on him, he is so gorgeous! Plus, there's certain foods... like chocolate syrup... that I'd simply love to eat off Kasey's delicious body!!

Um... Where was I going with this? Right. Vote for me as Miss Food City 2008!!

And in other news: Dale Jr is what I call Sometimes-Hot. Sometimes he is very hot. Sometimes he's ~~really not~~ - Jesus, Junior! Did the shower, soap AND razor forcibly run away from you? I know you're "laid back" and shit, but there's really no excuse for looking that way unless you've been stranded in Alaska. With bears. And the bears stole your soap. And razor. And have threatened to maul you to death if you step into the shower.

While I'm contemplating the merits of stepping into a shower with bears if it meant Junior looking hot, here's a video. I think it's pretty new:

Both stories from This...

WOOHOO!!!!

2007-10-08T13:03:46Z

Congratu-ma-cations, Kimi!

#1 in China GP.

Photo from Kimi's website.

MY chase is on.

2007-10-04T14:55:05Z

Now, that's hot.

Kimi is teh sex.

2007-10-03T15:50:07Z

Well, after seeing that ad, I think I'm made of jello.

Green flag!

2007-10-02T16:51:49Z

Heya, hey, hey. It's my journal for NASCAR and fanfic stuff.

I'm going to leave my posts open, but feel free to friend me.

I take requests for fanfic writing.